Back in my early days of parenting, I started writing in an on-line journal called Confessions of a Model Mom. This was before blogging became what it has…and I used it as a way to blow off steam and just express myself.
I honestly don’t think anyone ever read it, but that didn’t matter. I was in the middle of being a full-time mom to two very little littles without any outside help and think I gained some sort of sanity by just writing it all out. Just recently, I found a few of my entries and they made me both laugh and get a little emotional. Motherhood is bittersweet.
My kids are 11 and 13 now. It took me reading these old confessions to remember exactly how maddening life with a toddler and infant was. How we moms ever survive those years is honestly a mystery to me. We deserve every medal and accolade ever made!
….and if there are dads in the picture….please guys….never forget that that woman in front of you is a goddess. She created life….a living, breathing human being, INSIDE of her body! She labored and birthed a little person and endured unbelievable pain in order to do so….and spends years of her life dedicated to teaching those little people how to do everything. EVERY. THING.
It’s amazing really when you think of it. Of course, there are some moms that are not present, and some dads that take on the role of both father and mother…and those men deserve to be worshipped too….but, I think in general it’s too easy to dismiss moms as “just doing their jobs”.
Yeah, we’re doing a job…but it is the toughest and most important one imaginable. We are selfless superheroes….and at the very least, that is how our kids view us. Even if they are throwing tantrums or rolling their eyes at us. Believe it.
As a reminder of what life was like when my kids were tiny…and as a note of recognition and solidarity to those of you going through it now….here’s one of my first ever mommy posts:
The Halves of Motherhood
Okay, so I’ve decided that being a mom means only having half of everything…and more often than not, even just a quarter of said things. At the end of each day, when my kids are asleep and I prepare myself for half a night of slumber, I look back at the preceding 12 hours or so, and think to myself how I just can’t seem to get anything done in its entirety.
All day, every day, I only get the time to empty half of my bladder before it becomes deathly silent or terribly raucous (there’s never an in-between) and I KNOW my three year old is cooking up some trouble.
I only get to take half a shower more often than I care to admit. You know how it is, you finally get a few minutes to freshen up because by the grace of the Divinities both kids are napping at the same time, only to hear the baby wake up and start screaming. So, you have to jump out of the shower dripping wet, with half a leg shaved and shampoo in your eyes before the toddler hears his sister wailing and wakes up in a panic. Believe me….toddlers woken up from their naps are a force to be reckoned with.
My meals are always left half eaten because, God forbid, I can get through an entire sandwich or cup of coffee before I am being hailed with desperation to to fix a train track or change a diaper explosion fit for a HAZMAT team.
I usually only get half dressed when off to run errands with the brood in tow. How can I be bothered to change completely when I have to make sure there are enough diapers for the baby and snacks for the toddler to make it through a marathon grocery trip? Not to mention, I only end up getting half of what was on my shopping list because halfway through the store the toddler starts screaming that he’s dropped the coveted green gummy bear and is inconsolable.
Oftentimes I only end up getting halfway through an email I’m reading or writing before I have to go play supermom and save the day by rescuing my son from the impending doom of a pin prick sized spider that happened to make its way into his room. They tell you to “sleep when the baby does”…hahahahaha….yeah. That always ends up with me taking half a nap (that’s generous, actually) because as I am starting to doze off, eyes grainy and heavy, I hear “Mammmmaaaaaa…..I’m awaaaakkkkkee!!” 45 minutes too soon.
I speak in half sentences to any adult I come across and forget having any phone conversations. Those always end after 3-4 words. Kids ALWAYS find it appropriate to perform death defying acts of extreme sport-ism when their mother is on the horn.
Nothing I start to do EVER gets done anymore….and I am a totally neurotic, Type A, neat-freak kind of chick that needs everything to be done on time and perfectly. I’m a list maker for sure, and at the end of the day I get all knotted up if my “to do’s” aren’t “too done”. But, such is motherhood. Maybe I should take up yoga or meditation….but who has time for that? Maybe half a session? Or maybe half a valium…with half a martini? Hmmm…….
header photo by Pixabay @Pexels
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