I’m not afraid to admit that I’m as tied into social media as the rest of the world. I do thank the high heavens every single day that I didn’t grow up with this or like this though. My Gen X self enjoyed life in the moment without a screen in sight (unless it was Saturday morning TV time). However, life today is so intrinsically tied into online platforms that I have had to find a way to shut out the noise and maintain my mental health in the process while still enjoying the positives that social media has to offer.
The thing is, social media can be a wonderful tool. I started off using it to keep in touch with my friends and family who are spread far and wide across the globe. Later it evolved into a way of sharing my writing and content creation. Much later it became a source of entertainment. There are difficult days made so much easier by sending reels and memes to friends and family who are also mid life’s struggles. There are unpleasant chores made more interesting by listening to Spooky Scary Storytime on TikTok or the Dad Challenge Podcast on YouTube. Mindless entertainment, but it has its place.
What I’ve decided, since 2020, is to shut out social media noise as much as possible, by curating my algorithms and only interacting with things that bring me joy or help me grow. Anything that can affect how I feel about myself, my life, and my world in a positive way. Now, I’m well aware of what is happening across the globe and in my country, but I am choosing to limit my exposure. You see, our human brains are not built to take in or take on all of the devastation and negativity that exists on the earth. We are designed to care for our immediate villages. This almost omniscient state we’ve been thrown into via social media and the constant bombardment of “bad news” creates an almost constant anxiety and anger even amongst the best of us. It’s not natural. It’s not healthy.
This doesn’t mean that we should stop caring about others. It just means that we need to moderate how much we take in in order to protect our minds and health. I make it a point to have open and educated discussions within my own microcosm of family and close friends about the state of the world, changes we want made or wish existed, and then we focus on how to better ourselves and our small little lives. We know open minds, balanced perspectives, and education are powerful tools for navigating through chaotic times….but we also know that absorbing the constant barrage of “information” on social media, the constant hate and fear mongering, is counterproductive and damaging. Which is why I choose to not engage with anything online that is designed to add to the negativity, noise, and division that is rampant nowadays. I also don’t post anything to add fuel to those fires. (Although I’m sure someone will be offended by this blog post lol!)
I have been asked what my stance is regarding politics, religion, and whatever else makes people want to disown their own families. I get asked why I never post about these things…do I not care? I do care. I have my opinions and my beliefs, but when I post on social media, I choose to share things that make me feel good…and that I hope will make those who follow me smile, reminisce, chuckle or nod in agreement. Gen X content, music from our childhood, positive affirmations, interesting health and wellness information, the occasional irreverent joke, stories of the relatability and insanity of parenting adulthood…this is what can be expected of me. These are the things that boost my mental health, and hopefully yours too, when you come across any of my pages.
I’ve very rarely rocked the proverbial boat with a post on maybe Facebook about how a certain something or occurrence in the “news” was making me feel and, almost without fail, have had the usual suspects find great offense and loudly let me know about it. It’s made me quickly realize that the last thing I need is to take on other people’s intolerance of different viewpoints. We don’t live in a day and time where a lot of people can accept differences….and, unfortunately, I believe social media has played a strong hand in this. It’s a lot healthier to sit down face to face with someone and have a real conversation where you can share your differences of opinion, offer each other new viewpoints, and maybe end the chat with a hug and a laugh. I remember these moments happening amongst adults when I was kid. Now, I see adults insult and degrade each other within a 200 word limit or less on public forums. It’s sad and embarrassing.
Part of shutting down the noise on social media and protecting my mental health involves working on not losing respect for people in general…which can be hard to do when you see how they act and speak towards each other online. I’ve muted folks, ignored posts, and quickly unfollowed when I see certain online behaviors. I refuse to engage with negativity. I’ve decided to use social media, and remind my kids to use it, as that great tool I want to believe it was intended to be. A way to keep in touch with people you care about, a way to share positive content, a way to create businesses, a way to make ironing clothes a little less boring.
So, when you see me online and wonder why I’m not getting into debates or sharing about the things that create division in an already all-too-divided world….this is why. I may not be able to change the big things, but I can exact change within myself and my family. I can focus on getting and staying healthy, both body and mind, and working behind the scenes to do good within my community. I can get outdoors more, read physical books instead of headlines and blurbs, and I can create a social media existence that is positive and a lot less noisy. After all, how can we create peace in the world, when we can’t even create peace within ourselves? It’s a question worth pondering, isn’t it?
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